I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
