Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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