My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize