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she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
