from now on my penis is your penis
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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