i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
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