Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
