There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
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