i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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