I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
