She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
