careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
