Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
