in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
