Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
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