So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
