One girl and one boy is just not enough.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Randomize
