and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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