Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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