i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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