I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
