Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
