Hey man sorry I got all grabby
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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