3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
