I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
