Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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