I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
