How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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