Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
she pinky promised me she was 18
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
