Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
