Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
