i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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