why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
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