Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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