You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
You took a bar mat shot.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
