I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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