i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
