Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I am never drinking with the goths again.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
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