Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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