no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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