she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Randomize
