a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
