I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Randomize
