Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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