I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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