smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
