conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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