it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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