Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
