so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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