I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
